Sacrament of Marriage
When you stand before your family and friends to proclaim your love for each other you are taking part in the Sacrament of Marriage. This sacrament draws you closer to each other and to God.
Required Documents
The following documents are required by the church before the wedding is held:
1. Baptismal certificate of both the bride and groom.
2. Witness form for both bride and groom, to be filled out by either the couple's parents or close friends. These people give testimony with regard to the maturity and freedom of the couple.
3. Pre-Nuptial Declaration (for mixed marriages). This declaration states that the Catholic will practice his/her faith after marriage and will raise the children Catholic.
Non-Parishioners
For couples residing out of town, if you or your parents are not members of Seven Dolors Parish, there is a fee of $250 for use of the church for the wedding. A $100 deposit is required when the date is reserved.
For couples who will be married out of town and need only marriage prparation services from Seven Dolors, there is a $75 fee.
The final date for the wedding must be confirmed by one of the priests at Seven Dolors.
Planning the Ceremony
A marriage service is a worship service
The wedding ceremony is an act of worship celebrating a Sacrament of the Church. In keeping the ceremony worshipful, the following guidelines are set by the Church.
Rehearsal: One Hour is adequate. The couple gives the marriage license to the priest at this time.
Music: Sacred music is used at the wedding ceremony because of the sacredness of the moment. Pop music may be sung at the rehearsal dinner or wedding reception. Having a vocal soloist is respected and accepted, and should not exclude or replace the musical participation of the assembly. Those invited to the wedding become a worshipping assembly joining the couple in praising God and celebrating this sacred event. The music also reflects the purpose of various parts of the wedding liturgy.
Photography and Videotape: Please have all photographers consult with the priest before the service so they know what is allowed. No flash pictures are allowed during the ceremony. Photographer & video operators using the choir loft should be sensitive to the musicians using the area.
Decorations: Candles and candelabras may be used from the church for a fee of $25. A plastic sheet is placed under the candelabras. It is inappropriate to place objects on the altar such as the unity candle, plants, etc. Please do not rearrange the plants, stands, or candles in the sanctuary without permission from the coordinator of art and environment. We ask that no one throw rice, wheat, birdseed or similar materials before or after the ceremony.
Appreciation: The following is a suggested minimum offering to express appreciation for the services provided by the minister and others to prepare you for the Sacrament of Marriage.
| $75.00 | |
| $75.00 | |
| $10.00 | |
| (Fee determined by individual musicians) |
Set Up and Clean Up: The church is set up for the liturgical seasons. If you decide to add to the settings, you are responsible for the decorating before the wedding and for the cleaning up both the church and the dressing areas afterwards. Because of scheduled events, there may be limited set-up time. All decorations must be removed immediately after the ceremony. Before using any items in the gathering space, such as a table, please check with the priest and environment and art coordinator.
Scheduling
| 1. | Initial Meeting With Marriage Preparation | This is a get-acquainted meeting, at least six months before the ceremony. At this time you may set your date. If the parish hall is to be used for the reception, it should be reserved after setting the wedding date. |
| 2. | Taking the FOCCUS | (Facilitating Open Couple Communication and Understanding) This is a pre-marital inventory to identify discussion areas in your relationship. It deals with inter-personal communication, attitudes toward children, in-laws, finances, and other areas. |
| 3. | FOCCUS Follow-Up | This is a series of sessions with the priest, pastoral associate or counselor to discuss the FOCCUS results. |
| 4. | Engaged Encounter/Marriage Preparation Weekend | St. Isidore's Catholic Student Center offers marriage preparation weekends periodically throughout the year. There is a limit of twenty couples per weekend, so it is necessary to enroll well in advance of your wedding date. Engaged Encounters are offered at the Spiritual Life Center in Wichita and at the Capuchin Friary in Victoria, KS. These are held at various dates throughout the year. A schedule and phone numbers for the reservations will be available from the priest or pastoral associate. The Engaged Encounter begins on Friday evening and lasts until Sunday afternoon. |
| 5. | Wedding Coordinator | The wedding coordinator required for all wedding ceremonies is Tonya Bachamp, 785-776-7553. The fee is $100.00. |
| 6. | Natural Family Planning Session | This session introduces you to the Creighton Method of Natural Family Planning. |
| 7. | Liturgy Planning Session | The Church has the responsibility of being concerned about what takes place in the house of worship and within the liturgy. The Marriage Preparation Director will help in planning a meaningful wedding celebration to make that day a memorable occasion. |
| 8. | Wrap-Up Session | This is a "review" session with the celebrating priest to discuss your experience of marriage preparation and to cover ceremonial details. |
Special Circumstances
1. Mixed Marriages
In an ecumenical wedding, the couple may have the minister of another denomination participate. As a matter of protocol, the presiding priest will invite the minister of your choice to participate. Permission can be obtained for the wedding to be held in the church of the non-Catholic party with the non-Catholic minister officiating.
A Catholic wedding can be celebrated without a Mass. If either bride or groom is not Catholic, we recommend mixed-faith couples to consider having a wedding liturgy without the Mass.
2. Cohabiting Couples
Special guidelines for cohabiting couples have been published by the Kansas Catholic Conference. The priest or counselor will discuss these guidelines and their implications with the couple.